The Movie of My Life

If you've had the pleasure of spending any time with me you would know that I can quite often be found bitching about my relationship status and my job. For this blog we will be focusing on the relationship part. In case you are a little out of the loop, I'm single, as always. I'm always single! I've tried dating, but I'm a little picky/ not good at picking guys that are into me. Classic He's Just Not That Into You. You would think that I wrote that book, I didn't but it's seriously so true! All of it. So anyways, I tend to rip apart the genre of movies called... romantic comedies.

I am a big fan of the chick flick. As cynical and jaded as I am, there is a part of me that is a die hard romantic and a believer in true love, but sometimes, enough is enough! I'm over the "hate each other until the very end, then profess our love for each other, but one of us is still in a relationship so it's sticky, finally come to our senses, drive off into the sunset happy endings" movies. Please show me who that happens to... in REAL life.

In the movie made of my life, the first 24 years can be summed up in a montage of bad dates and me sitting on my couch eating Ben and Jerry's with my parade of roommates. I get so mad that I love these movies that end with 'The End'. Really? Is that really how it ends? I don't believe it! At least not for me! The romantic, crazy and spontaneous things that happen in movies just don't exist in my life. That was until today...



...I was at work bartending and this good looking guy about 5'11'' with blonde hair and a suit came into the bar and wanted to ask me a question. He started off with, "this is going to be the craziest thing you've ever been asked, so please don't get mad." (This is when we cue me thinking, "I've heard that before. What do you want? Change for a twenty?  No! A beer!") He explained that he and his girlfriend just broke up on Saturday (Cue my excitement, like I said...cute), and they were planning on going to the Bahamas on Wednesday. He then proceeded to ask if I knew anyone that would want to go with him.  Mind you this is to the Bahamas, on Wednesday, until Monday, all expenses paid. (Cue me jumping up and down with my hand raised.  In my head that is).

As much fun as this sounded, it wasn't practical for a few reasons. One- when he asked me this, I had to then ask him what his name was. Two- I know I'm lacking spontaneity, but that's a lot to plan for in 2 days. And three- I didn't really want to know the whole plane ride that I was going to die in the Bahamas by some crazy stranger I ran away with. This whole situation could have been so cool, I mean this is what most movies are made of, but who in their right mind is actually going to go through with something like this?





You've gotta give the guy props though for trying. He was either telling the truth by trying to have fun with his sucky pre-paid couple’s vacation dilemma, or was a creeper in a good looking suit with cute eyes! Once again I will say that this could have turned out to be the best thing to ever happen to me if I had taken him up on his offer (that he was making to every bartender on the block, but that's not the point), but why risk death to find out? I know, I'm dramatic. But come on... what would you have done? I guess I'm going to have to keep reading scripts until a better one comes along, because right now, the script for the "love" portion of my life sucks!